I’m writing this on Thursday of last week. My day is winding down, the Blonde made waffles from L. L. Bean for dinner, and we had some great french roast coffee from Whole Foods. It’s been a long week and tomorrow’s my day off. I’m a pastor therefore I pray, and I pray a lot, so I’m finishing off the day by spending some time discussing the ups and downs with God.
My friend says if you have ever stood before the Lord and not experienced fear than you have never stood before the Lord. My fear is not that He’s mad at me but rather that I have missed His mark. What I’m about to share with you is personal and in confidence so please keep it just between you and I. We’re friends, right? Because I’m a pastor most people think I’m perfect, the truth is I’m not. I do walk on water, but it’s only a part-time gig. My conversation with God was typical, I told Him how awesome He is, and then I shared how less-awesome I am. I confessed my failures of the day. They are as follows: I worried, I crossed the line - what I mean by that is only God is omniscient but I tried to be (this is closely connected to worry), someone hurt me today and forgiveness did not come easy, but it did come, I was (am) impatient, and I grumbled.
I don’t wonder what God thinks of me in my failure, I’m confident of His love (He wants the best for me), His mercy (I don’t get what I do deserve), His grace (unmerited favor) and His forgiveness (releasing). I did not let God down today because, well, He’s God and He has known I was going to blow it today before I was even conceived. See, God likes me, and He likes me a lot, and it’s for more reasons than that I’m ordained. He thinks highly of me because I’m His and nothing can change that.
When we come to the Father, He scoots over and tells us to warm our hands by the fire. It’s not okay that we sin, it’s just not the end. His mercy is new every day (Lamentations 3:22-23). It's new every night as well. He told me to tell you that.